 |
| The author was frustrated with her family's lack of organization, so she started a weekly family meeting during which they all go over their schedules for the coming week. CatLane/Getty Images |
A few months ago, I found myself in the kitchen having what I thought would be a quick, one-on-one chat with one of my kids. Ninety seconds later, the rest of my family — my other three children and my husband — had wandered in, each armed with a fresh set of questions and requests.
Suddenly, five voices were talking over each other. One child needed a ride to an extracurricular activity. Another wanted to know the date of an upcoming dentist appointment. Someone else announced they were starving. My husband was trying to clarify plans for the weekend. I was standing in the middle of it all, mentally juggling logistics while realizing — with mounting frustration — that this was our daily reality.
We were living in a constant state of reactive chaos. Communication breakdowns, last-minute schedule changes, forgotten requests, and missed reminders had become part of our family’s normal. We were tired of scrambling, rushing, and trying to keep everything straight on the fly. That’s when it hit me: we needed to carve out dedicated time, once a week, to sit down together and actually talk through our plans, needs, and responsibilities.
What started as a desperate experiment quickly became one of the most valuable habits we’ve ever adopted. Now, our weekly family meetings are the anchor of our household. Every Saturday, we gather for about an hour — sometimes less, sometimes more — to sync schedules, make requests, handle allowances, and talk through anything else on our minds. The result? Our days run smoother, our stress levels are lower, and our household feels far more connected.
Syncing Schedules Is the Heart of Our Meetings
The number-one reason we started these meetings was to get on the same page about what the coming week would look like. With four kids — two teenagers, a preteen, and one almost-tween — plus two busy parents, there are countless moving parts.
Everyone brings a planner, whether paper or digital, and we go around the table sharing what’s on our calendar for the week ahead. This includes everything from sports practices and games to dentist appointments, school events, work meetings, and social plans.
Each person is responsible for writing down the information they hear from everyone else so there are no excuses later. This single habit has nearly eliminated the dreaded “I didn’t know that was happening today!” scenario. It also allows my husband and me to make quick, in-the-moment decisions about who’s driving where and when — something that used to require multiple text chains and a fair amount of last-minute scrambling.
Special Requests Happen Here — Not at Random
Our meetings also serve as the perfect time for the kids to make any special requests. If one of them wants to go to a movie night with friends, attend a birthday party, or try a new extracurricular activity, this is when they ask. We negotiate rides, agree on pickup and drop-off times, and add the details to everyone’s planner right then and there.
Sometimes these requests are smaller but still important — a certain snack for a gathering with friends, a new notebook for school, or supplies for a class project. The beauty of having these conversations during the meeting is that we can immediately add items to our shared online shopping list. That way, nothing gets forgotten in the rush of the week.
Allowance Day Keeps Money Matters Clear
Once a month, usually during the first meeting of that month, we hand out allowances. The kids know it’s their responsibility to make the money last until the next distribution — and they also know this is the time to ask any questions about what they’re expected to pay for themselves versus what we’ll cover.
Occasionally, this moment also turns into a mini “settlement” period, when siblings pay each other back for borrowed money or chores traded for cash. It might sound small, but it has been surprisingly helpful in teaching financial responsibility and encouraging them to follow through on agreements.
Check-Ins and Announcements Build Connection
One of my favorite parts of these meetings is the chance for everyone to check in and share how they’re doing. This can be about anything — schoolwork, friendships, hobbies, or even something they’re looking forward to.
For my kids, it’s often a mix of updates and requests for help, such as needing tutoring in a particular subject or advice on how to handle a tricky situation at school. It’s also our time to share family-wide news. At one recent meeting, I told them about my new teaching job, which led to a fun conversation about what it would mean for our schedules and routines.
A Space for Negotiation and Problem-Solving
Our meetings have become a safe space for negotiation — and, sometimes, creative compromise. Recently, we found ourselves in a lighthearted but surprisingly difficult debate over what to name our new dog. We passed around a piece of paper so everyone could write down their top three choices. While we haven’t reached a final decision yet, the process itself was fun and collaborative.
The kids also use this time to raise concerns about chores, rules, or household routines. If something isn’t working, we discuss it openly and decide together whether to make changes. It has been an unexpected way to teach them negotiation skills and show them that their voices matter in how our household runs.
The Results: Less Chaos, More Calm
Before our weekly family meetings, we were a family constantly reacting to life as it happened — rushing, forgetting, and tripping over each other’s schedules. Now, we’re proactive. Everyone knows what’s coming, what’s expected, and how they fit into the bigger picture of the week.
It’s not a perfect system — surprises still pop up, and sometimes life throws a curveball — but the difference in our stress level has been dramatic. Our meetings have become a time not just for planning but for connection, laughter, and shared responsibility.
For us, what started as a way to tame the chaos has turned into something much deeper: a weekly reminder that we’re a team, and that life runs smoother when we work together.
